The Story Of Food As Foe

You are afraid to enter. 'What if they judge me...? What if they hate me...? What if they see right through my clothes...? I don't want to be here...', You take in a deep breath and push open the door. The others don't notice you there. Your neighbor smiles at you as you take your seat. You smile back. 'Wait, was her smile fake? Maybe sarcastic? Why would anyone smile at me? I'm nothing special...' You're washing your hands at the sink and look up at the mirror. 'When did I get that dark spot? Did I always look like that? Maybe if I just suck my stomach in a bit...' You submit your work and someone says, "Great job! Looks like you improved a lot!" You reply with a cheery thank you. The genuinity in the smile of your neighbor returns. The days pass; all good ones. But the more you look down on yourself, the more the positivity seems to fade away.

One day, you're lying in bed. It's cold. Everything appears to be lopsided. 'I just wish to do something right. I have no self-esteem... I don't like how I look... I hate myself... Like, am a bother to everyone around me, worthless... I want to feel in control! In control of anything.' You decide to control the numbers and calories on your plate. You eat very less. You measure everything you ingest. You begin to starve yourself. To stop the hunger from hurting, you eat a lot more food, stick a finger down your throat and vomit it all out. You allow this awful process to continue for days. Nothing feels right, though. The cold and the numbness has taken over completely... 'I don't want to leave my room. I- just want everything to be normal.' But counting your food is the only thing that makes you feel in control...

• Facts and Stats

Sometimes, when people feel overwhelmed, anxious or confused, they might turn to food. Either their feelings are poured into food or their emotions stop them from consuming any. By doing so, there is harm to their mental and physical health. That is an Eating Disorder (ED). There are many types, Anorexia Nervosa (AN) where one eats close to nothing as possible and overexercises due to the fear of gaining weight, Bulimia Nervosa (BN) where one eats food but ends up purging it out through the body through vomiting, laxatives, overexercising, etc., Binge Eating Disorder (BED) constantly binging on food even when not hungry and seeking comfort in it. (There are so many EDs out there. However, these three are some of the most common and most known).

Today, we live in a society that teaches us to compete, succeed, and ultimately be on top of the world. Today, we live in a society that criticizes vulnerability and struggles. Today, we live in a society that wants to see the best bodies around us. Today, we live in a society that expects perfectionism without showing our tears. When young children and young adults are exposed to society, they come up with new ways to hide their fears and cries. One of these rising ways is - Eating Disorders. Although the number of people diagnosed with eating disorders in the world is low at 9%, it cannot be ignored how high the death rates are. Here are some statistics:

This image is taken from Wikipedia:

Also, it is to be noted that according to the National Institute of Mental Health (NHIM) Anorexia has an extremely high death (mortality) rate compared with other mental disorders. (You can learn more about them from the official website of NHIM here). Naturally, when a person experiences such disorders, it becomes important for them to go through treatment and help overcome them. But unfortunately, only 10% of people with eating disorders receive treatment, and of those, approximately 80% do not receive the proper care. This is heavily concerning because about 70% of people with anorexia and 50% of people with bulimia recover within five years. Five. Whole. Years.

What about India? Where does our homeland stand? It is hard to say because, sadly, there are barely any studies have been done by an official body and there are no nationwide surveys on the issue. You can check on the internet, but you will not find a completely authorized organization providing the stats on the same...

• Spread awareness to spread wings

Eating disorders do not revolve around food, so many more factors and feelings contribute. The feeling of being in control of anything, the low self-confidence, the fear of being judged, the world of beauty standards... Food just happened to be a way out of problems. Food, which is supposed to be fuel to the body, suddenly feels like an extinguished fire. It becomes harder to wake up in your own skin. It feels overwhelming to step outside. The numbers on the scale become an obsession. You will want to stop it, but it calls you back even louder. Within a few months, it becomes an unnoticed habit. You stop wanting anyone around... But what really can help, is reaching out to the right person. Reaching out to a trusted one who is not facing the same problems. Many times, people do not know what's happening to them unless they talk about it.

So, we as a society should understand that these are facts; Eating disorders are very much real, and it completely affects one's physical health and drowns out the light on one's mental health. The first step to comprehending these facts is - spreading awareness: The more the people know about it, the easier it is to understand. It should be okay to talk about mental struggles, body image, and eating disorders so that people with these struggles come forward and conquer their fears. This will only be possible when we are aware and open-minded about the situation.

We as a society, should be more understanding and accepting of vulnerability and body image issues. We as a society should make it easier for everyone in the society to live in... Not make anyone feel less... If that really is hard to do so, try putting yourself in anyone's shoes, no one is on a straight path. No one. We all have bumps along the way. Instead of allowing the people around us to think that those bumps are mountains, we should allow them to understand that it is just another hurdle to cross over.

Once again, if you feel like you are unable to talk to anyone, do consider reaching out to a professional. Nothing comes before physical, mental, or emotional health.

Signed,

Ann.